Embracing a Slower Pace – Prioritizing What Truly Matters
Hello, Friends!
As we transition from summer to fall here in Canada, I find myself in a reflective mood. This time of year often brings a sense of fresh starts—a new school year, new activities underway, and new goals in mind.
It feels like there’s always a never-ending list of things to do—both tasks I need to complete and things I want to pursue. And sometimes, that can leave me feeling overwhelmed. It’s tempting to cram as much as possible into each day. For a recovering perfectionist who, for so many years, tied her worth to productivity and how many boxes she could check off, it can be a real challenge not to overdo it…to intentionally slow down. But lately, I’ve been noticing—and hearing from others—that “the happiest people I know are actually slowing down, not speeding up”.
I’m all for setting goals and working toward them, but in a culture that encourages “more for the sake of more,” I believe it’s equally important to remember our "why." Whether it’s a work-related goal or a personal ambition, I ask myself: What’s the purpose behind this goal? Do I want to feel more seen? Is this goal tied to someone else’s approval? Or does it genuinely feel expansive and aligned with my core values?
If I find myself answering yes to either of the first two reasons, I try not to judge myself but to approach it with compassion. It’s okay to want to be seen or validated—it’s part of being human. But can I pause before jumping in? Because the truth is, no amount of external validation or material worth will ever be enough if I’m only looking outside of myself. When I create the space to slow down, I can reconnect with myself, my values, and my “why,” which helps me make more intentional decisions that align with how I want my life to feel.
Here are a few questions I find helpful when checking in with my “why”:
Am I making this decision from a place of love, or to try to attain love/attention/validation? – This is a powerful question because it allows us to step back and assess our motivations. Are we pursuing this goal because it’s truly fulfilling, or are we seeking approval or external recognition?
Am I attached to a specific outcome? – When we’re overly focused on the outcome, it can create pressure and anxiety. Letting go of that attachment helps us stay more present in the process, rather than fixating on the end result.
How is this decision aligned with my core values? – Decisions that align with our values tend to feel more authentic and satisfying, while those that conflict with our values often lead to stress or regret.
Does this decision help grow me into the person I want to be? – Growth often involves making choices that challenge us in positive ways. If a decision contributes to our personal development and supports the character we want to embody, it’s often worth pursuing. For some of us, that development will be about rest.
How does this decision feel in my body? Our bodies can be excellent guides when it comes to decision-making. Do you feel tension or unease? Is this from misalignment, or simply stepping outside your comfort zone? Or do you feel a sense of calm and alignment? Tuning into these signals can offer important insights.
Taking the time to reflect on these questions, instead of operating on autopilot and mindlessly aiming for more, allows me to create space for what truly matters in my life. I find that I’m calmer, healthier, more focused, more connected to myself, and even more creative when I slow down.
So, I leave you with two things. The first is that in practicing what I preach, I’ll be taking a short break from the blog and social media to be fully present and nourish connection. The second is a beautiful parable about remembering our “why”:
There was once a businessman sitting by the beach in a small Brazilian village. As he sat, he saw a Brazilian fisherman rowing a small boat toward the shore, having caught several big fish. The businessman was impressed and asked the fisherman, “How long does it take you to catch so many fish?”
The fisherman replied, “Just a short while.”
“Then why don’t you stay longer at sea and catch even more?” The businessman was astonished.
“This is enough to feed my whole family,” the fisherman said.
The businessman then asked, “So, what do you do for the rest of the day?”
The fisherman replied, “Well, I wake up early, go out to sea, catch a few fish, then go back and play with my kids. In the afternoon, I take a nap with my wife. In the evening, I join my friends for a drink, and we play guitar, sing, and dance throughout the night.”
The businessman then suggested, “I have a PhD in business management. I could help you become more successful. You should spend more time fishing, catch more fish, and with the extra money, buy a bigger boat. Eventually, you could own a fleet of boats and set up your own company, producing canned fish and managing a distribution network.”
“And after that?” the fisherman asked.
The businessman laughed, “You’ll live like a king in a big house, and when you retire, you could move to a village like this, wake up early, catch a few fish, play with your kids, nap with your wife, and spend your evenings with your friends.”
The fisherman smiled and said, “Isn’t that what I’m doing now?”
I look forward to connecting with you again soon!
With heartfelt gratitude,
Christina
