Embracing Patience – How Slowing Down Can Speed Up Success
Hello and welcome back!
“C’mon, hurry up already!” “What’s taking so long?”
How often have you heard that? Or said it? I’ve personally uttered these or similar phrases more often than I’d like to admit. In a culture built on hustle and efficiency, where quicker is often seen as better, it’s no wonder many of us struggle with patience.
While there are moments in life when quick action is necessary, many of us approach our daily lives with an undue sense of haste, and it’s not as beneficial as we might think.
Feeling rushed increases our stress levels, even if it’s just perceived time pressure. When this happens, our executive functioning diminishes - those “mental processes that enable us to plan, focus attention, remember instructions, and juggle multiple tasks successfully.” In this hustle culture, our bodies react to the pressure as if facing imminent danger, when in reality, the consequences are usually far less dire (namely some short-term emotional or physical discomfort). All the while, this heightened state can not only impede our executive functioning, but our ability to self-regulate, ironically slowing us down.
Imagine a child learning to tie their shoelaces, now pressured by a parent to hurry because they’re running late. Does this pressure help the child move faster, or does it add to their frustration and slow the process? What if, instead, we offered patience during their learning, supporting them as they navigated this new skill? Would they be better able to self-regulate in moments of frustration along the learning curve? And what if we had received the same patience as children? Perhaps then, we might afford ourselves more grace to learn and grow, trusting our abilities to navigate life’s challenges.
When I first stepped into the world of coaching, someone asked me how long I would give it. My response was simple yet open-ended: 'Oh, I don’t have a timeline in mind but I'm committed to giving it the time it needs.' I didn’t have all the answers about how things would unfold, but I was ready to trust in my ability to adapt along the way. Naturally, there were moments when impatience crept in, especially when progress seemed slow. Each time, I took it as an opportunity to pause and reflect on what those feelings were really about—often they were tied to deeper fears or unexamined expectations. By acknowledging these feelings and realigning with my core values, I found the strength to keep my focus on the long-term goals, reminding myself that meaningful change often requires patience and persistence.
Timeliness has its place, and not every moment warrants a leisurely pace…but are we rushing through moments that might benefit from a bit more patience? What would happen if we gave ourselves more patience?
Increased Executive Functioning: A calmer mind allows better focus and decision-making.
Enhanced Focus on Goals: With patience, we can stay aligned with our long-term objectives without getting sidetracked by short-term setbacks.
Improved Resilience: Patience builds our tolerance for challenges, enhancing our ability to bounce back.
Better Problem Solving: With a less rushed approach, we can think through problems more effectively.
A More Regulated Nervous System: Patience helps maintain a steadier state, reducing stress and its physical impacts.
If you’re wondering where to start, here are some tips to cultivate patience:
Practise Accepting What is: Learn to sit with things as they are, even if they aren’t ideal.
Build Tolerance for Discomfort: Comfort with discomfort allows you to wait out the necessary periods of uncertainty or challenge.
Reframe Your Perspective: View situations from a different angle to find value in the waiting or slow progress.
Remember What Matters Most: Keep your long-term values and goals in mind, which can make patience feel more purposeful.
Take Care of Your Body: Physical well-being supports mental health, reducing impulsivity and fostering patience.
Allowing impatience to lead can often let fear cloud our judgment, pushing us to rush through life's moments that might deserve more of our time. Whether it's skipping necessary self-care, feeling like it’s too late for career changes, or simply not taking the time to let a child tie their shoes, the sense of urgency isn't always justified. The real risk lies in potentially facing future regrets or feeling unfulfilled because we didn’t give ourselves enough space to fully experience and embrace life’s processes. By expanding our window of patience, we gift ourselves the opportunity not just to survive the daily rush, but to truly thrive in a well-considered life.
With heartfelt gratitude,
Christina
