Embracing Small Steps – The Pathway to Big Change
Greetings and welcome, Friends!
Joining me here likely means you’re curious about or interested in personal growth. While taking my first steps on this journey, feeling stuck and ready for things to change, part of me secretly hoped for that one ‘a-ha’ moment that would usher in peace, freedom, and fulfillment.
While I have found peace, freedom, and fulfillment along the way, they didn’t materialize through a singular moment of enlightenment. Instead, they emerged from a series of small, incremental shifts – changes not in my circumstances, but within myself. And this process didn’t happen overnight. The fantasy of waking up one day fully equipped with all the answers and willpower to flawlessly implement them, without hesitation or set-backs, is just that – a fantasy. Change, even when positive, is inherently challenging. Our ego, in its quest to protect us, clings to the familiar, even when painful, fearing the uncertainty of unchartered joy. As the Buddhist Thich Nhat Hanh put it, “People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.”
Knowing the changes we wish to make is one thing; implementing them is another. Our habits and patterns, originating from coping mechanisms to navigate past challenges, tend to run on autopilot and resist change. Add life’s inevitable stresses – whether related to time constraints, financial pressures, emotional burdens, or depleted energy – and even the best intentions can be derailed. In these moments, offering ourselves compassion and accepting our imperfect attempts can become our best allies for staying patient and forging new, lasting habits.
A common pitfall? Trying to overhaul our lives all at once. For instance, embarking on a health journey by adjusting our diet, starting a workout routine, and committing to mindfulness simultaneously, while admirable, can feel overwhelming and unsustainable. The secret to success lies in small, consistent steps. Just as we wouldn’t expect to master a heavy lift at the gym on our first day, we can’t reasonably expect ourselves to adopt a whole new lifestyle overnight. Developing new skills – and neural pathways – requires a step-by-step approach, gradually building our resolve and capabilities.
One strategy that helps guide me through change is aligning new habits with my core values. It strengthens my resolve and discipline, reinforcing my commitment even when the initial enthusiasm and motivation wane. For instance, connecting a work-out regimen to creating balance in my life and continued personal growth through bodily connection is more sustainable than focusing on an external goal related to my appearance.
Integrating new habits into existing routines also supports lasting change. When we can tether a new habit to one that’s already established and automatic, it boosts our chances of sticking to them. That could look like drinking an extra glass of water before morning and nighttime teeth brushing, thinking of three things we’re grateful for while doing dishes, or even doing a few push-ups before jumping in the shower. These small actions pave the way for greater change.
As we progress, we’ll naturally be confronted by the beliefs that kept our existing neural pathways in place. Exploring these beliefs, whether on our own or with support, is key for lasting change and the peace, freedom and fulfillment that come with it. Remember, it’s the accumulation of small steps that leads to significant transformation. Whatever change you seek, you’re absolutely capable, and I’m here to cheer you on every step of the way!
With heartfelt gratitude,
Christina
